My last blog post was July 16, 2016. The past 355 days have been interesting. Let’s recap:
At the end of April 2016 I cut my hair into a style I had secretly coveted for years. Cutting my hair has always heralded significant change throughout my adult life. I have dubbed the style Night & Day, my barber co-signed. It’s my signature look.
was iconic. I managed to manifest my newfound self-confidence into something palpable. 2016 was indeed my year of metamorphosis in ways big and small, obvious and invisible to the naked eye. I lost a total of 27 lbs and never once worked out–all diet friends, all diet; please believe the 80/20 hype. As people began to point out my physical change with their mouths agape, it dawned on me one South Beach day that I now possessed a new aura, and somehow was more authentically myself, and I felt greatly empowered by it. I had two occasions on the beach where men approached me because my body was knocking! All new territory for me and an extreme compliment considering the skewed amount of perfect bodies seemingly ever present on that beach. It’s safe to say I’ve eased into my physical appeal.
Fall generally signals the end of what we always hope will be an endless summer. Even here in South Florida I felt what once were balmy summer nights dissipate into chilly autumnal evenings. Fall in a tropical climate is not as romantic as in the Northeast, so you have to change colors internally, and hibernate your summer behaviors like a formerly savage bear, if you will. The leaves that free-fall and litter the ground in a blanket of transition are strikingly absent–so sometimes you fall, instead.
I met someone one Wynwood night in the late summer who was on vacation from NY and let myself fall into a doomed long distance situation. I was abstinent for two months while we built a romance on a foundation of sand. He flew in for a weekend in October and his sex game was laughable. We’d agreed that if the consummation of our relationship was underwhelming we could end things. I stuck to the agreement, he felt a way, end scene. An aside: his wack ass performance still annoys the fuck out of me because he talked such a good game. He had one job! But hey fool me once…won’t fool me again.
This past winter was an ideological one in which I felt myself shedding old behaviors of seasons past because I no longer found them useful. My long distance disaster of a relationship which transitioned me from Summer to Fall actually served a purpose: shifting my more savage outlook on dating to a more open perspective. In that small window of time the icebox where my heart used to be dissolved and much to my surprise, I met someone new…
… let’s put a pin in the recap.
Next post coming soon!